I was trying to think about how to write this...
Do I do this as an open letter to my Dad? Do I do this like a diary?
How do I do it?
Anyway, I'm not alone in finding Father's Day tough - many do! Whether their Dad's are no longer here with them, or whether their Dad's have never been around - it's tough!
I also wanna say Happy Fathers Day to the single mums. They should be acknowledged too.
This is my first Fathers Day without my Dad, I want to get this out the way now so on Fathers Day I can celebrate and remember my Dad - but also enjoy my day with my Boyfriend and his family.
My Dad was (and still is) my hero. He taught me right from wrong, he taught me to be myself, he taught me to act, he told me it was okay to be me and not always be girly, he was always so proud of me and I guess it's part of the reason I've allowed Skullsandsnaps to suffer a bit - he's not here to enjoy and celebrate this stuff with me anymore. I guess I also worry I won't do as much amazing stuff without him here, and I'll let him down. Hence why posts are less are less, and why I've kind of neglected it.
He was always the one to tell me to follow my dream with Car Photography or something related to it - like the videos etc - but he backed me on following that, and now with working it's not so easy. It's definitely not easy to find a sustainable photography job in the Automotive sector.
I've just started watching the singing videos I used to do with Dad in the car, and would share to Instagram and I am so glad that I shared those with the online world, because it allowed people to see how great he was. He couldn't often attend events towards the last year or 2 of his life but it meant a lot to have people constantly ask about him. I'm still overwhelmed at how much love and support we received after he passed away. People were so lovely!
There's people I wish my Dad could of met & there's people I'm SO glad my Dad did meet - especially having got to meet, and "approve" of my Boyfriend. (He was one tough guy to please!) Now a topic I've never really touched upon was the Mum thing, for many many years it was just my Dad raising me and my Sister. My Dad ALWAYS wanted me to reconcile with my Mum and me being as stubborn as I am, just kept saying no. With a messy history - I always refused. Until it was too late... February this year, everything got too much for me, I didn't like living alone at the house without Dad, I needed help. I swallowed my pride and asked Mum for help. We wrote off 10 years of no contact, apologised and resolved things in hours. She took me in. I hate that I was so stubborn to of not sorted this years ago - whilst Dad was still here.
[This is why I include my line at the top about single Mum's being celebrated on Fathers Day, we used to celebrate my Dad on Mothers Day in the years he raised us alone, and now we remember Dad and celebrate Mum for doing both]
I have soooo many stories and examples of how awesome my Dad was - but I'm not going to sit here and write them all out. I'm just simply going to say - if you're lucky enough to have your Dad still, call him, sit and talk to him, ask his opinion on stuff, take him out, go for a coffee, go for a drive... just enjoy that time together!
To those in the same position as me, with not having your Dad here with you physically to celebrate with - celebrate his memory! Remember the good times.
I think thats enough therapy writing for today - have a good weekend all.
Skully x
